“if only you could see”

February 2007 March 2007 April 2007 May 2007 June 2007 July 2007 August 2007 September 2007 October 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 May 2010 June 2010 September 2010 October 2010 January 2011 March 2011 April 2011 May 2011 August 2011 August 2012 September 2012 October 2012 November 2012 August 2013 November 2013 December 2013 January 2014 June 2014 July 2014 August 2014 May 2015 May 2016 June 2016 July 2016 December 2016 June 2017 July 2017 June 2018 November 2020 December 2020 April 2021 November 2021

"Ow!" She cried out.

The sound of her own voice filled her ears. She stared at her index finger as a drop of blood appeared on the surface. Despite the many times she pricked herself with the needle, the initial feeling was always unexpected. She licked her finger and continued sewing. In the young girl's lap was a small stuffed animal, one she favored out of all the ones she had. There weren't very many to begin with, so when she accidentally ripped it while playing, the tears came almost instantly. She'd replaced buttons before, an easy task. But never a repair this crucial. Some of the stuffing came out, and it felt as if her own heart had been ripped out. She was able to save some, but most of it had dirt and other things tangled in the soft filler.

The room was mostly silent again, save for the sound of her own breathing and her hands working the needle. A few minutes later, and the repairs were complete. She tied a knot in the string and cut off the excess. She turned the toy over, and two black buttons stared up at her. She took the two front paws in her hands, and rubbed her thumbs over the soft fur. It was comforting. She stood up, and set the cat at the foot of her bed, and smiled. She felt something much like hunger in her stomach, so she turned around and walked to the kitchen, closing the door on her way out. The cat, with the aid of gravity, slid off the bed, and landed in a slumped position, staring at the closed door where the girl once was.

Labels: fiction junction

Sorry, just wanted to make a relatively "permanent" note of things I want to save for in the immediate to near future:

Keyboard

Drawing Tablet

My own box cutter so I can give back Tim's



Haven't done much research on the first two, just need to go to Lowe's for the third I'm sure. More later.

Testing my mobile setup.

do you ever wonder where your life is heading?

because i used to. at least, i used to be more concerned about it whenever i was thinking about the lives of two people. now, i haven't really given it much thought until today. i don't want to always work an hourly paid job at a fast food restaurant with only a bicycle to make my way across this lonely city. sure i have fun and i have my friends.

but i want love. at least, i want to feel loved.

i am enjoying the companionship of these new friends i have made. i miss my old friends. there is a deep bond that i have with them that i miss. staying up late and talking about whatever. doing whatever. being carefree and running around the park, playing hide and seek or whatever. just...whatever, you know?

for the remainder of this post i'm going to type without looking at the screen.

starting...now.

i dont feel the need to correct myself or for self censoring.

i'll probbaly look at the screen occasionally to make sure i didn't jump a few lines in the middle of a sentence or something.

at any rate, i am happy with myself right now. i am relatively carefree and i am having a good time.

but when is it time to stop having fun and strt getting serious? i'm not really sure about the answer to that...i sppose either you'll get bored of doing nothing or you'll eventually realized your life is going nowehere.

my life is going nowhere, excite [this was supposed to be except..] i am living day by day with no immediate golas....or long term ones.



there is a boy i like.
there is a keyboard, piano that is, i want to buy and learn to ply.
i want to go back to school.
i want a car. or a motorcycle.
anyways, i am working more diligently on getting my life more organized, getting my finanaces or whatever set straight, and being more of an adult as they might call it

boring stuff.

it would be nice to sit here all day...listen to the cars pass by...the sound of the wind as they rush past. it would also be incredibly mind numbing. i like to learn. i want to be productive.

anyways...this is starting to drag on, i'll continue this later.